Truly, the lack of civility in American political discourse today is pandemic.
Now, while we may have some legitimate disagreements with those terrorist, hostage-taking Tea Party cavemen, we would never resort to ad hominem attacks. Furthermore, we would never stoop so low as to raise our voices in anger when they oppose us on climate change, even if they are as bad as Holocaust deniers while they’re using baby seals for target practice. We understand that it may take a while for them to realize that carbon should be taxed by the gram and will happily show the slopeheaded imbeciles all the understanding they require while their tiny impaired brains catch up to our genius.
Still, we would admonish them to be more reasonable in their debate and not torment us with their tax cut withdrawal symptoms as the psychotic addicts that they are. Just because our policies have never worked and that we’re borrowing more money than we can hope to repay is no reason some drooling horde of yellow-flag waving wingnuts should throw a childish hissy fit and oppose us. They should follow McCain’s example of bipartisanship and epic campaign failure.
Now, be good little serfs and remember who your betters are while keeping your discourse civil. Better still, keep your discourse nonexistent. That way, we don’t have to remind you that strapping on your suicide bombs is a bad way to debate, you terrorist extremist racist bigoted homophobic Tea Party losers.