Monthly Archives: June 2010

Chicago Residents Get the 2nd Amendment At Last

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Good news today on the 2nd amendment.

The Supreme Court affirmed that individuals have the right to keep and bear arms, and struck down Chicago’s gun restriction laws.  It’s another win for those of us who actually do things like recognize the 2nd amendment and more importantly, all of America.  While it doesn’t strike down gun laws anywhere else than Chicago, it will make it easier for others to assert their 2nd amendment rights in the future.

On the down side, the decision was 5-4.  This should have been a no-brainer, but at least four of the Supreme Court justices currently serving have less than no brains.  Either that, or their thought processes have been pickled beyond recovery by their ideology.

Still, good news is hard to come by lately, and we should take this for what it is:  another win for the 2nd amendment.

I Can Haz Bordur Stayte: Ludicrous News 6/25/2010

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It’s time for another installment of Ludicrous News.  Political news that would be so much funnier if the people causing it weren’t in charge.

1.)  Peggy West, open borders Democrat from Milwaukee told Arizona she might have been able to understand the law they just passed if it actually shared a border with Mexico.  Yes, really.  Perhaps it’s hard to see where Arizona is when you’re as far out there as a Democrat.  Either that, or she’s a product of the modern-day esteem-first education culture.  I can haz bordur stayte!

Fortunately for Peggy, Senator Kyl was kind enough to correct her, and send a map besides.  How he got his letter to Wonderland where this woman apparently resides is beyond me.  Must have had it delivered via White Rabbit.

2.)  Just because I should mention it, Al Gore is having a bit of a problem with an accusation made by a masseuse.  According to her, Al wanted a happy ending, and was very aggressive about trying to get one.  The accusation is dumb enough to be Ludicrous News, though I’m reserving judgment on whether or not this actually happened until more evidence surfaces.

It doesn’t bear much thought otherwise.  Al Gore taking after his old boss?  Try and get that image out of your head.  Oh the humanity…

On the other hand, if you’re a Taiwanese animator, you’ll have some fun with it.  Perhaps you’ll have better luck getting through that video at that link than I did.  Don’t push yourself.

3.)  And finally, the Vuvuzela.  Obnoxious soccer fan instrument of choice.  Plastic trumpet of endless bumblebee sounds.  Why is it Ludicrous News?  You can’t call it anything else but ludicrous.  Except possibly annoying.

Even Hitler can’t stand it.

That’s Ludicrous News for today.  The news that makes laughing easy and parody tough as hell.  Seriously, they could at least try to be more serious.  How’s a humorist supposed to work when the truth can’t be spoofed?

An Open Letter to Jim Deakin

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Dear Sir:

I appreciate and respect your perseverance in the Arizona Republican Senate nomination primary.  People who won’t quit are admirable and in short supply.  This is why I would like to propose an alternative to your current course that you may find acceptable.

The race hasn’t played out your way.  You could persist through to the end, but that won’t work out well for you or anyone else.  You cannot win unless your numbers suddenly spike, which means a guaranteed McCain redux.  You know what he is as well as any of the rest of us who’ve grown sick of the RINO hack, and nobody wants that.

You want to serve and be a stateman?  One of the non-political class that stepped up to fight the status quo?  You can do so, and not only that, but give yourself a better chance of gaining your future national office aspirations in the process.

Leave the Senate race and start a little smaller.  Run for something local or statewide in Arizona.  Get elected, and be the kind of statesman you want to be.  Put your locality and state first and solve problems like Governor Christie or President Reagan.  Build a track record of positive political leadership that will give you the respect of those of us hoping for more than just the next McCain.

Play the long game.  Build your list of accomplishments, your reputation, and your warchest diligently, then try again.  Start by becoming a Congressman.  From there, onward to Senator.  Only then, if you have taken this advice and don’t sell out, you’ll be able to say:

Good people of Arizona, I walked the walk.  I stood up where others cowered to solve problems for real.  I defied the special interests that wanted amnesty, cap-and-trade, and all the other fool notions floating around the political class, and I will serve you again in this way if you elect me to Washington!

This is what the Tea Parties are seeking.  This is what can get you elected.  That rarest of qualities in a politician:  being the real deal.

I’m not asking you to walk away from your political aspirations.  I’m asking you to go about them in a manner that will better serve you and the people you wish to elect you.  If you remain in the Senate race, you will only be remembered as a spoiler, which will at the very least put a kink in your career.

The consolation prize for your loss is everyone believing you were the reason they were stuck with McCain again.  He may win anyway, but there’s no reason that should be blamed upon you.  So save your career from this.  Take the long way around, and next time you could well be the newest celebrated Republican Senator from Arizona.

Sincerely,

Ryan Ambrose

Deport the Illegals to Blue States

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Had enough of blue state sanctimony on illegal immigrants?  Don’t worry about it.  It turns out the blue states might be good for something after all.

There’s a rumor that Obama may be thinking of granting amnesty by executive order.  Not good if he pulls it off, and we’re going to have real problems getting rid of the illegals if that happens.  Fortunately, there’s a solution:  We can deport the illegals to the blue states, and take it out on the blue.

Yes, on the surface it sounds facetious, but what else are we going to do with them should this occur?  We won’t be able to deport or discourage them then.  Plus, it’s not like the blue states were serving any other useful purposes.

What, we were doing something with California otherwise?  It has at least two big, beautiful sanctuary cities (LA and San Fransisco) that would be really happy to receive all those new social-services sucking illegals.  Why not give them some?

Seriously.  By points:

  • We could get the illegals out of states that actually do things, like Arizona.  Granted Arizona has that one pesky maverick chipmunk of a Senator, but it’s otherwise a nice state that doesn’t deserve it’s illegal immigrant problem.
  • It concentrates the illegals into states that already vote Democrat, so now those states will just vote Democrat some more.
  • It’s not like the blue states can refuse should push come to shove.  For example, if LA is already buying power and water from Arizona, Arizona has leverage against them should they get stubborn.  Most blue states are going to hit parasite status soon if they’re not already there, unless they try and turn it around like New Jersey.  That means plenty of leverage all around.
  • By the way, Governor Christie isn’t fat, it’s just where he puts all of his awesomeness.
  • Someday, the Nobel Peace Prize hopes it can be awarded a Governor Christie, but it’s not worthy.
  • The unions in New Jersey wish they only had to deal with Chuck Norris.

But I digress.

So, if Obama wants to do something stupid like try this stunt, we can always threaten his Democrat voting friends in the blue states with a tidal wave of illegals given one-way bus tickets.  If they complain, they can try something original, like producing for themselves.  At the very least, it’s something to consider.