Good News: That Whole Strip Club Thing Was Just RNC Business

Good news!  After watching the latest screw-up at the RNC go down over the course of a day, I can happily report that the whole simulated lesbian strip club thing was just business.  It was an after-party for young donors, as reported at Hot Air.

Gee, I’m glad that’s all cleared up now.

Ahem, excuse me.  Republican party?  Yes, we’re trying to stop and then reverse the socialist decline of our country.  Would it be possible if you could, for just one moment, stop suffering from Cranial Rectum Insertion and get back to the task at hand?  I’m not exactly prudish, but still, this is no time for strip clubs.

Until you regain your focus, don’t ask me for any money.  I’ll just donate by candidate, and let the rest of you burn.  Thanks, and please get a grip.

The Nostril Ultimatum

Henry Waxman is not a happy man.

I don’t think he wanted it this way.  Companies like Deere, Caterpillar and Verizon let everyone know that due to Obamacare, there were going to be additional costs.  Some companies announced layoffs.  Waxman’s response?  An invitation to come and testify before his committee because their facts are grossly inconvenient.

And by invitation, think “The Nostril Ultimatum.”

It gets even more fun.  Ski resorts in Colorado are also reporting that they’re going to take hits.  More inconvenient reality for those pesky Democrats, who are trying to sell Obamacare as the path to unicorns and bunnies frolicking in the streets.  Utopia not working out to plan then?

We all warned the Democrats, but no.  They just had to win, and passed Obamacare on a party-line vote so they could rub it in the faces of us conservative rubes.  Didn’t take that victory long to fade, did it?  Soon, they’ll get to own the unemployment, the senior health care cuts, and new taxes that all the committee invitations in the world won’t help bury.

But for the moment, Waxman can go on his Nostril Jihad.  I suggest he hurries though, as November will be putting it to an end.  In the meantime, we can give some thanks for the fact our thuggish leaders are demonstrating massive incompetence in our subjugation.

Thoughts On Getting Through Obamacare

No joke now, folks.  It’s zero flak time.

At some point in the near future, the Fidel Castro endorsed Obamacare is going to start making itself felt.  There will be layoffs.  Medical professionals will leave the field, and people will find they have less money thanks to more taxes.  Obama, of course, will still be his arrogant and petulant self while he pats himself on the back for being ‘historical’.

Oh, this is going to be historical all right.  Obamacare will rank right up there with The Great Depression in terms of the good it brought to this country.  Pay More, Get Less, Wait Longer.  So it’s time to think up new ways to get by while this nightmare starts gnawing away.

For those wondering what to do next, here are some suggestions that may help mitigate the trouble to come.

  • The retail business model: If you’re  a small office practitioner, like a dentist or a family doctor, switch to the retail business model.  Stop taking insurance when the nastiness begins in order to stay in business.  If you’re a hospital, consider diversifying into some “cash only” business to stay open.
  • Independent contracting and freelancing: This goes for both businesses who will need things done, but can’t hire, and people who can’t get jobs because the cost of employment has shot through the roof.  Being an employee isn’t the only way to earn a living.  If you have skills, you can freelance them, which makes life easier on businesses who could not otherwise pay you.  If you run a business, you can hire freelancers to do things per task without saying “I’m sorry, I can’t hire you right now” and leaving someone out on the street.  No, this may not be ideal, but if the alternative is unemployment, or in the case of business, doing without when you can’t really afford it, it’s better than nothing.
  • Take it out on the blue: A lot of businesses have had their “live and learn” moment now.  They donated to Democrats and supported their initiatives, and guess what?  They were shafted anyway.  The Democrats have just demonstrated they’re going to bleed businesses dry because they’re too radical now not to do so.  The businesses, then, should take it out on the blue.  If they have to lay off or close shops to survive, take it out of the blue states first.  Democrat voters support the elections of those that are burning them, so it’s only fitting this occur.  Some of those currently clueless voters might even grow some sense when they get hit with Obama’s consequences first and worst.
  • Zero tolerance for RINOs: No RINO primaries should ever be uncontested again.  Ever.  We’re in a real fight now with real socialists who have just demonstrated who they really are.  There is no “reach across the aisle” or stealth mislabeled Democrats in the “big tent” anymore.  If a Republican is not in it to win it for constitutional government, it’s time to generate their term limits the old fashioned way:  by primary loss.  No exceptions, no excuses, and no pity.  This category includes “maverick” John McCain, who not a month or two ago was trying to change vitamin policy with Dorgan more to the Democrats’ liking, which means he’s learned nothing.  Despite contrary assurances from Sarah Palin, he is foremost among those that needs to be gone.

This is not the happiest post I’ve ever written, but I hope perhaps these ideas can help blunt the trouble coming our way.  Best wishes to us all.

Global Warming Causes Hippies!

It’s time for another global warming spoof.

As reported at Michelle Malkin, the latest attempted panic attack about global warming is that it may lead to increases in violence.  This one is almost as fun as global warming being a national security issue.  So now it’s time for the spookiest, most dire global warming mock threat ever…

BEWARE!  GLOBAL WARMING CAUSES HIPPIES!!!!!

You didn’t listen to our warning about spontaneous human combustion.  You stood deaf at our pleas to prevent global-warming caused galactic destruction.  You laughed and mocked us during that irrelevant Climategate distraction.  So now you’ve really done it.  If you don’t try and stop global warming with our cap and trade bill, it’s going to cause…HIPPIES!

It will happen without warning.  One moment, you’ll be walking down the street with your friend on an unusually warm day, and then you’ll hear “Hey man, want to drop some acid?  This heat is harshing my mellow.”  You’ll turn and see a long-haired bum in a tie-dyed T-shirt looking at you through drug-addled eyes as he tries to distinguish you from the pink elephants.  Then, you’ll suddenly have an urge to spray-paint flowers all over a mini-van!  It will be awful, irreversible mellow-harshing harshness!

Don’t say we didn’t warn you.  Act now!  Tell your congressman you want hippie-preventing cap-and-trade before it’s too late!

Enjoy, and feel free to add your ideas for global warming panic play spoofs in the comments below.

Addendum, 3/29/2010:  Changed the part with Jane Fonda.  I really just don’t like her.