It’s time for another global warming spoof.

As reported at Michelle Malkin, the latest attempted panic attack about global warming is that it may lead to increases in violence.  This one is almost as fun as global warming being a national security issue.  So now it’s time for the spookiest, most dire global warming mock threat ever…

BEWARE!  GLOBAL WARMING CAUSES HIPPIES!!!!!

You didn’t listen to our warning about spontaneous human combustion.  You stood deaf at our pleas to prevent global-warming caused galactic destruction.  You laughed and mocked us during that irrelevant Climategate distraction.  So now you’ve really done it.  If you don’t try and stop global warming with our cap and trade bill, it’s going to cause…HIPPIES!

It will happen without warning.  One moment, you’ll be walking down the street with your friend on an unusually warm day, and then you’ll hear “Hey man, want to drop some acid?  This heat is harshing my mellow.”  You’ll turn and see a long-haired bum in a tie-dyed T-shirt looking at you through drug-addled eyes as he tries to distinguish you from the pink elephants.  Then, you’ll suddenly have an urge to spray-paint flowers all over a mini-van!  It will be awful, irreversible mellow-harshing harshness!

Don’t say we didn’t warn you.  Act now!  Tell your congressman you want hippie-preventing cap-and-trade before it’s too late!

Enjoy, and feel free to add your ideas for global warming panic play spoofs in the comments below.

Addendum, 3/29/2010:  Changed the part with Jane Fonda.  I really just don’t like her.