It must be getting down to the wire now.
What search terms sent the most people to my blog today? Variations of “Scott Brown Is Bad”. I suppose more than a few people are trying to dig up dirt on him. At first, I just wrote it off, but then I considered the opportunity to perform a public service.
Massachusetts is going to be bombarded by negative ads against Scott Brown this weekend. On top of it, Brown just told Obama to stuff it, as reported at Hot Air, which will make things even more fun. It’s going to get nasty, so why not just save everyone the trouble of paying attention to it by giving them the gist of what all the Democrats’ ads will say in one fell swoop? They’re searching for it anyway.
So, in the world according to Martha Coakley and the Democrats, Scott Brown is bad because…
…he’s an evil tea-drinking far-right extreme Republican extremist who’s extremely extreme. When he’s not snorting peanut brittle with his Tea Party friends, he’s driving around in his Satan-mobile painted with swastikas while wearing his Bush mask and listening to Rush Limbaugh. And worse still…he can spell Massachusetts.
Clearly, he’s an over-educated elitist snob when he’s not being a Republican rube who couldn’t spell “IQ”.
Plus, this guy actually listens to the people of Massachusetts. Who does this guy think he is? We’re talking about Ted Kennedy’s seat! How dare he think of using it to…serve his constituents! He even went out to meet with them and shake their hands!
He came into contact with…the little people. This is unthinkable. It boggles the mind. Where was I?
Oh yes. HALLIBUURTOON!!!! And I will not spel it kurrectly, bekuz I’m not an elitist snoob!!!
This seat is mine. MINE!!! I’m entitled to it!!! I’m a Democrat, and he’s just a BusHitlerHalliburtonNaziHandShakingSnoob! How dare you people of MassachusettEs THINK you have a right to decide who sits in it?! In fact, how dare you THINK AT ALL?!
Snooooooooob!!!
There, now you’ve heard pretty much every Coakley and Democrat ad that will run until the election. In terms of intellectual content, worthiness of attention, and relevance to the decision by the Massachusetts voter, this spoof sums it up nicely. Only it has more humor and less sinister-sounding piano music.