AP-Yahoo Reports McCain Slightly Less Useless than the Democrats

Good news!  All of John McCain’s ordinary supporters see him as marginally less useless than the Democratic contenders, which gives him an increasingly large pool of ordinary supporters to annoy.

Yes, after all his tireless maverick leadership, he can be content in the knowledge he’s seen by ordinary supporters as a mediocrity, on top of creating the new maverick supporter paradigm of the 21st century.  How does he fit so much accomplishment into a day?  This humble and slightly overwhelmed maverick student couldn’t tell you.

Yes, even Bob Barr, potential Libertarian presidential candidate, has volunteered to become a maverick supporter, and give those of us confused about who gets our votes instead of John McCain a real choice.  Let’s hope he wins their primary in late May, so he can help us maverick supporters give the Master Maverick, John McCain all the maverick votes he deserves.

McCain Annoys Everyone With Gas Tax Proposal

John McCain proposed removing the federal gas tax to help at the pump this summer, and a few other tax proposals that at first glance, appear to be aimed at garnering conservative support

This in and of itself is sure to annoy the independents and moderate ordinary supporters, but how does it annoy ordinary conservative supporters?  I’ll grant that perhaps you have a point, and that they wouldn’t see it because they won’t consider:

  • That the Master Maverick, John McCain’s party is the minority in both houses of Congress now, arguably due in large part to the tireless maverick leadership McCain showed for six years, especially on immigration.
  • That means he can promise all the conservative things he wants, knowing they have virtually no chance of making it to the President’s desk.  This makes him look conservative, while still allowing him to act like his old self.
  • Of course, I would never mention that when his party did hold the majorities and a tax cutting measure came his way, he voted against it twice, and defended his position with class warfare.

So, maybe I was wrong.  This won’t annoy ordinary conservative supporters of the Master Maverick, John McCain in the least, because they won’t think it through.  I am just his humble and slightly overwhelmed student after all, so you can’t blame me for being befuddled every so often.

McCain is All Our Fault

Feel guilty.  It's all our fault.Talk about a masterpiece of a demogogic.  And I heard it from an ordinary, vanilla conservative supporter of McCain’s, no less.  It’s just another sign of the Master Maverick’s brilliance, and I’ll explain it to you now because his genius is worthy of some recognition.

In the world according to this empty piece of rhetoric, we conservatives are solely to blame for McCain’s nomination, and therefore must make amends by voting him into office.  The fact someone would choose to use such a blatant liberal soundbite on his own philosophical companions in the first place is unbelievable enough.  Once you add the complete indefensibility of the reasoning, you get a golden piece of illogic that could not have been produced without the tireless maverick leadership of the Master Maverick, John McCain.

Of course, the ordinary, vanilla conservatives will swallow this whole, and not even consider that

  • The Master Maverick, John McCain is responsible for his own judgement and positions, and their indefensibility if someone sees them that way.
  • The Master Maverick, John McCain is responsible for his own behavior.
  • The Republican Party is a private organization that can choose its associations, and could have done something about him without conservatives a long time ago, had they the spine.  I’ll refer you to Liebermann and the Democrats as an example of this.
  • The Republican Party could have brought their own primary process under control sooner but didn’t, resulting in a nominee chosen by their POLITICAL OPPOSITION.  Conservatives had absolutely no control whatsoever over the scheduling of the Republican primary process.  In fact, the Republicans have grown contrary enough to ignore us out of sheer spite even if we did.
  • The other candidates might have made better decisions regarding their own campaigns, but didn’t.
  • The other candidates are responsible for fostering and growing their own support, instead of being the giant pool of unacceptability that they were.
  • Even if the supposition is true, voting McCain into office compounds the fault, not redeems it.  This exercise in disjointed logic would be like saying “We’re responsible for the accidental release of ebola.  Now we must redeem ourselves by insuring everyone catches it.”

Take all of this into account, and you can see this for the giant, worthless guilt trip that it is.  It’s another good reason you should become a happy maverick McCain supporter like me, instead of a reluctant ordinary one choking back bile.  If his own ordinary, vanilla supporters, reluctant or not, have to revert to cheap tactics like this, you’ll be happier as a maverick one.

Seriously, this is the guy who’s been defended with the word ‘disappointment’, because his ordinary supporters think it’s a euphorism compared to his actual record.  Whereas a maverick supporter like me can see every bit of his behavior as the incomprehensibly brilliant plan that it is, and make more maverick supporters every chance I get with a smile on my face.

 Why continue to torture yourself by being an ordinary McCain supporter?  Become a maverick supporter of his today!

Speedlinking Across the Spectrum, April 10 2008

Stories about McCain from across the political spectrum:  liberal, conservative, and independent.

If it’s maverick news, I’ll take it from anyone.  Want to be featured here?  Comment in a speedlinking post or write me, and you can help me take the cutting edge political support paradigm of the 21st Century, the maverick supporter, to new heights.